Living as God's Treasure

Our greatness and success before God are not defined by what we do, but rather who we are. Others will try and define you by outward accomplishes, but there is a greater standard. Its in how God sees you and who u r to Him. The person who grasps this knows fulfillment in just being the One God loves. It doesn't mean God doesnt want us to be successful in other ways, because He does! But the standard we look to is not the standard others place on us. We must know our place in the heart of the Father and recognize when others opinion of our success is different than God's. We may not ever have a huge house and a fancy car, but we are the treasure of His heart and nothing can take that away from us. We may not be the most beautiful or the best at a certain talent or occupation, but we are number one to Him. When we know this, really know this, we dont have to seek it anywhere else. There is great fulfillment in just being His!

This morning when I was laying in bed refusing to get up, the Lord said something very powerful to me. It may not mean much to you, but for me it was huge (and very very sweet of Him). He took me way back to elementary school (way back, indeed) and helped me remember something that I hadn't thought of in years. I remembered perfectly a moment while running out to recess when a boy fell into me. He arose angrily and said "get out of my way, you fat pig." I remember clearly how those words made me feel. Now u have to understand something. I have not thought about this moment in years. Probably since elementary school. I obviously don't need therapy because of it. Yes, that boy should be ashamed of himself for sure, but I'm ok after 20 years! Yet, the Lord was so sweet to not only remind me of it, but to tell me He remembered that day and saw in my little heart how it crushed me. It may not be a big deal to me now, but it is and was to God. He cares about everything, friends! And it's His goal that we would know more and more the treasure we are to Him. He wants to break the lies and labels that have been placed on us by others so we can have happy hearts just knowing we are so so special to God. It feels really good to not have to strive anymore.

Learning to Lean on God - Understanding His Desire to Be Involved in Our Daily Issues

It’s in how we perceive our identity before God that defines how we live our life before Him. For instance, if we think He is a dictator and we have no effect on what occurs in our life, our relationship to Him in prayer will be little or nothing. Why would we want to talk to a God that sees us as robots? If, on the other hand, we see Jesus not as a far off dictator, but more as a “friend that walks closer than a brother,” our life before Him will look very different. How involved is God? And how much do we contribute to what He does and doesn’t do? How much does He want to be involved in this thing called life anyways?

The fact is, He wants to walk alongside us. The very reason behind creating us is that God would have a partnership with us. It’s the very thing we crave as human beings – intimacy. It is the joy we have when we are among friends, the feeling we get when we are among safe people, and the ability to swing wide our hearts and share what we want with someone without any fear of being rejected. That part of you and I is a part of the very heart of God. He longs for this kind of relationship with you and I. This is what He wants and this is what we are made for. Partnership and friendship with Him. Just to know that He cares about the smallest things that worry us should be a reminder of His desire to lift the things that bother us. We aren’t meant to walk through life alone. Although people are a gift from Him in our lives, it’s impossible for another person to know every part of you. Yet, God not only knows you, but is “familiar with all your ways.” (Psalms 139) Yes, we need others and it is no accident God has set certain people in your life, there will never be another that can understand you like He does. Your spouse can’t, your parents can’t, your best friend can’t, and you can’t even know yourself like He knows you! One of His names is “Counselor” because He knows exactly what you need and when you need it. He knows this because He knows you so well.

What do you lean on in tough times? Usually it’s something that will make us feel better for a moment. We are people made for pleasure and it’s human nature to turn to something that will help us “feel better.” It helps us to forget about things for awhile and we can hide behind whatever it is we are leaning on. For every broken heart, every disappointed person, and everyone who feels like giving up, there is one strong enough to hold you up during the darkest of times. Just go ahead and lean on Him – His shoulder is very comfy and quite safe. Stay there for awhile and don’t be afraid to pour your heart out to Him. He holds all of our tears in a bottle and He wants to hear everything you have to tell Him. I’ve wetted His shoulder plenty of times, and I always feel better when He gently picks up that heavy thing I had been carrying only to exchange it with His peace and love. Lean into Him when you have nothing else to give and He will carry you.

Tonight I feel His heart for us. Maybe you are carrying a really heavy load right now and you feel like the pressure is never going to give. His heart towards you is one of compassion. He is really good at walking with weak people through difficult situations. Actually, He is an expert at it. I would not say it if I had not experienced it for myself. The hardest part is learning to not try and fix everything on our own. Not only will it give us a nervous breakdown, but we just can’t do it. If that’s you, begin to see God not as a far off dictator but as a caring Father whose heart is so close. He is so very near to you! Lean in, friend!

Refusing to Live as Victims of our Pasts

One thing that is so incredible about God is that our past really is forgotten. It’s deleted from His memory forever. Unfortunately, we often struggle with forgetting it ourselves. Many people, often without anyone else knowing it, live in the shame of the past when God wants to call us out and bring us into freedom. We don’t have to live in the shackles of yesterday’s pain, mistakes, or failures. Hopefully here are a few practical things that will be helpful if you or someone you know is dealing with it.

One thing we must know is that although God forgets our past, He does not forget us. He knows exactly what you have gone through, whether other people do or not. He knows every detail and is willing to walk us through to where our past doesn’t control us anymore. The fact is, God really cares about us. This includes every part of our lives, from the smallest to the greatest details. This fact, in and of itself, can bring such relief to know that God understands us. He knows why we are angry, bitter, resentful, etc. There is nothing that is too far for God to not restore. Relationships may or may not be restored, but He can restore the inside of us to where we are no longer victims. We just aren't meant to live in slavery to our pasts.

Many emotions are felt when the past tries to rule over us. Fear is one of the greatest. When you sense fear, it’s important to know it’s not coming from God. Recognizing who God is and what He is like will help us to know the source of our emotions, etc. There is no fear in His love. Perfect love drives out all fear, and His love is perfect. So when we are bound up by fear (whatever that looks like in your life), God wants to break that off so you can walk in peace and confidence in God. It might be a fear of what people think or a fear that your past will influence your present or future. You don’t have to walk in it. God has something better.

Something else that we have all had to deal with is the huge issue of forgiving ourselves and forgiving others. Unforgiveness really does hurt you more than anyone else. It’s not worth holding it in to where it brings damage to your own life. The damage manifests in different ways and will eventually destroy other relationships in your life as well as yourself. Bitterness is a very ugly thing. Again, God wants us to know that He sees what has happened, He knows the details, and He isn’t apathetic about the wrong things that have been done to us. At the same time, He is committed to us living in freedom. Forgiveness is necessary for that to happen. It may not happen overnight, and you may have to keep forgiving until it’s a reality in your heart. God, overtime, really will work in our hearts to forgive those who have wronged us. Don’t feel bad if those old feelings of anger arise again. Deal with it, forgive them again, and go on. Don’t let it fester to the point where it ruins you. And don’t give up with the process. It may take time. And then there is the issue of forgiving ourselves. There is nothing worse than knowing you have made a mistake at the cost of someone else. It is normal (and probably a little bit healthy) to feel the seriousness of our mistake. God wants us to deal with it and go on instead of holding it against ourselves. There is nothing freer than to let go and forgive yourself or someone who has wronged you. Holding onto it will only bring disaster in your own life.

Lastly, I think the most important way of overcoming things of the past is to know how God sees us. I know I write about this a lot, but I think the subject is so important for all of us. We must know that our identity is not in our past. We must know that God sees us in a different way than those who are familiar with us in our lives that may only see us in the perspective of the past. I can’t tell you how freeing it is to have people’s opinion of you not matter because your identity is in how God feels about you, not others. You can forgive easier because you are “rooted and grounded in the love of God.” (Ephesians) No longer are you looking and searching for people to fill that void of helping you to feel significant. Your significance comes from the Lord in knowing you are loved and cared for by Him. His love covers a multitude of sin and there is absolutely no shame in His presence. Without hanging our heads, we can look straight in His eyes, so to speak. We must know who we are in God to have victory over our pasts and other voices that surround us. Even those that are closest to us sometimes are the ones that are too familiar to see who we really are in God. He wants to show you who you really are in Him, and you will really start to like yourself if you don’t already. No longer will the memories and thoughts from the past stop you from being who God wants you to be.

I hope this is helpful to someone out there. If your past is trying to haunt you, try answering these thoughts and questions:

1. What emotions/feelings do you have when dealing with your past? Anger? Unforgiveness? Bitterness? Etc… Being aware of our feelings is important. You may want to journal or talk to someone you can trust about it. Just don’t let it stay in there. Being aware that you are angry, etc is the first step to being free.

2. Have I forgiven the person(s) who wronged me? Have I forgiven myself? Have I tried to forgive, but just can’t seem to? If so, commit to asking the Lord to help you to forgive. Don’t give up on the process. Remember, it may take time.

3. Am I filling my mind with who God says I am (reading helpful books, positive relationships, other resources)? If not, commit to setting aside a part of your day or week to prayer and other helpful ways of connecting to God.

4. Be aware of words that you are speaking out of your mouth about the situation (words about yourself, words about others, etc). You may need to stop talking about it with certain people so you can gain perspective and move on. Surround yourself with people that are positive who can help you get out of it, instead of staying in the negativity. Our words really do matter. Being around people that help you, not hurt you, may be the most important thing of all.


Love ya’ll!

Do You See Him Smiling At You? A Story of Mercy

Life is full of new beginnings. Can you imagine how dull it would be if it weren’t. We would not appreciate the blossoming beauty of spring flowers if it weren’t for the winter season in which it all seems to disappear. There is something very moving about that which was seemingly without glory to all of a sudden burst into something beautiful. Yet, a few months later, its glory will once again fade.

I think we can learn much from this type of occasion. We can learn much about mercy and redemption. It seems that religion without a true reality of who God is would put the yoke of perfection on us which would drive any human being to either becoming an angry, judgmental, or mean person or cause them to go to the opposite side, which would be to condemningly give up because of their constant falling short. But I believe there is a secret in understanding His mercy in new beginnings.

It is the one who has been forgiven much who loves much. It is the one who has tried and failed, only to rise up and try again who has the Lord’s attention. David, a leader who failed miserably by giving into an affair, was called a man after God’s own heart. Yet, God saw His willingness to try again and was overwhelmed by the simple fact that David didn’t give up when life got nasty. We can learn much about His mercy and love for us when we ponder about new beginnings and we will have many in our life simply because our lives really are like a roller coaster. Up. Down. Up. Down. A bit of consistency might help, but it doesn’t seem to be this way for anyone I know. It really is all about not quitting or giving up. Sooner or later, life gets nasty. The nastiness may look different for everyone, but no one can escape it. No one. That should reassure us that we aren’t alone and also teach us the importance of having each other to walk through life with. No one is meant to be alone, especially when they are struggling.

The Lord invites us to share of His mercy. Yet, many are not willing to take of it because they know they don’t deserve it. So they stand at a distance quite possibly with the thoughts of “I have tried that life before and I failed. Miserably” or “I’m not even going to try it because I know I can’t do it.” And it’s true, we can’t in and of ourselves. Little do they know that it is this same story of mercy that is written on every one of our lives. He really does long for friendship with us and hopes that we will one day, even with all of our short comings, come a little closer and finally taste of His love. Those who do are pleasantly surprised and delighted by how He stoops so low and brings us so high by honoring us with His love and care. Isaiah 57:15 “I live in a high and holy place, but also with the one who is contrite and lowly in spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly and to revive the heart of the contrite.” He does live in a high and holy place, yet He longs to stoop low to wherever you are in life. You may have tried and failed miserably, but He is a God of new beginnings and His mercy is brand new to every one of us. It’s hard to understand and comprehend because we aren’t used to being treated this way. He, indeed, treats us differently than we have ever been treated before. He longs to honor you, to bring you close to His side, to listen to you, and love you.

So, let’s all learn the lesson of the spring blossoms. Life may be ever so inconsistent, and even our own hearts being the most difficult thing to train, but His love is ever so consistent and willing to give a fresh breeze of mercy to lift you out of your despair and defeat. As you look upon all the glory spring time was created to show us, I hope you see Him smiling at you.

1 John 3:21 “If our hearts do not condemn us we have confidence before God.”

Knowing Our Worth Before God

God's heart is so big. He has room enough in His big heart for all of us. We were meant to feel as though we belong and that we have a home, so to speak. I believe one of the saddest things on earth is for someone to not have a home. It is a place of safety, security, and provision. This is what He promises us. There is nothing more satisfying and fulfilling than for someone to feel a part of a family. To feel like we are taken care of and protected and to know we are loved and cared for. He has our back in this big ol world. He really has our back!

Oh how I long to know Him more. And to know that there is a love greater than what we have experienced! The more our hearts taste of Him it's as though we have barely began! He longs to bring into His love every person feeling alone in this world. I think we would be shocked at the number of people who feel it. Even those who are surrounded by others often feel it. We were made with the desire to be known and heard. We want to be listened to instead of going through life like a gerbil on a wheel. We were made for deep friendships and relationships because that's who God is and that's what He loves. He is about community. He is about family! We were made to feel so secure about ourselves and full of worth because of our value before God. The Father wants to speak His worth into our hearts so we can overflow with His love to others. Most of all, we can love Him in return and love others a whole lot better. That's who He is and what He does --He brings worth and value to who we are.

Learning to Receive God's Love

What I want to know is the God that sustains us through every season in our lives. I cherish the times I feel strong in Him. When He feels close, it’s as though I can accomplish anything. The confidence He gives is like nothing else. His love is stronger than what situations scream at us and when He speaks, fear and worry disappear. What about the days when we feel nothing? The moments when doubts seem to settle in and we can’t grasp the hope that He is near. When my heart grows weary and I feel empty, what will He say to me then? When I don’t feel strong and the desire towards God has decreased, what is His heart towards me in such a moment? This is what I want to know. What is God’s heart for us when we are weak? And I think we would all agree that we are just that. Weak. Some of us may not know it yet, but we are. When I say weak, I mean there is nothing in and of ourselves to accomplish anything in God without God. There is no desire in our hearts for Him without His hand placing that inside of us. The smallest little place that is towards Him inside of us is all His doing. It is His work of grace that causes our hearts to even want to say yes to Him in the first place. Knowing this stops us from striving and helps us to understand that, though we do have a responsibility before Him, it is mainly God who works in us to achieve His purposes and plans. Something I want to grow towards is being before God as a child. Since it is inside of God’s heart to want to take care of us, cover us, protect us, and love us, it is necessary that we don’t buck His ever increasing desire to be a Father towards us. Imagine a child that refuses to eat what his/her mother or father prepares for dinner. The child decides that he/she can make their own meal. After deciding on macaroni and cheese, the child heads towards the kitchen and gets the box out of the cabinet. To make this example even more fitting, this kid can’t read. He mixes together all the ingredients that is pictured on the box and pours it into a pan. After placing it on a burner, he is clueless as to how to turn on the oven or what temp to put it on. You get my point without me having to continue this story. We so often place ourselves in spiritual neglect by not allowing God to care for us when we feel weary and worn out by life. So many people are looking for something somewhere to fill the emptiness that is inside of them. I’m getting better about leaning into God when I sense this boredom and emptiness in my life. I’ve tried to “cook my own meal” before and I’m finally learning it’s better to just sit at the table my Father has prepared for me. It’s not easy to trust until He has allowed a few storms to come our way and we realize in the end that He does walk with people that don’t feel strong. We realize His heart is towards us and He is for us when all of life seems to be crumbling underneath what we thought would bring happiness from our own making. He is pleasantly able and willing to come and build something better for us, something lasting and of greater quality than anything we could come up with ourselves. It’s eternal. It’s rewarding. It’s life-giving. It’s having a Father that cares about us and loves us. His goal is that we would allow Him to love us more through life's difficulties.

Letting God Look At Us

I don't want to be afraid of God. The problem with you and I is that we are always having to deal with the fact that we simply aren't perfect. In every heart there is darkness. In every person there are things that need to be changed. Sometimes the person knows it, and sometimes they don't. When I am walking in pride, I don't know it until God creates a situation to show me the state of my heart. He does this because He is committed to judge sin in our lives. Every time He shows us a dark part in our heart, it's the beginning of defeat in that area of our lives. It is a glorious thing to come to know ourselves in the light of our weakness as well as how God views us. As long as we are in this earth, He is committed to changing us. It's very humbling when we realize the state of our own hearts, but it is the very work of God to bring an understanding to us of the necessity of being humble and broken before Him. Part of that journey is letting God look at us. It does no good to cover up or hide the issues in our hearts, but that is often the response we give Him because of fear. Letting God look at us, and opening up our hearts in honesty is a huge step in allowing Him to bring change to us. If you are like me, pride often stops me from experiencing Gods ways in my life. So for the ten billionth time, I come again asking Him to bring the needed brokenness in my life. Like everyone, I have many things that are in need of repair. But I also know we are dearly loved by the One doing the changing.

More On How God Treats Us (For Lack of a Better Title)

One thing that is true of God is that He is a huge giver. There is nothing selfish about Him. Yes, there are definately things He wants and things He asks of us, but the amount and measure He has given will always outweigh what little we have to offer. And even in the things He asks of us, His motive is always wanting what's best for us. That's what good Fathers do best. We can never give Him back the same amount He has given us. Though it is true on the earth that some can't ever repay what others give them, God is on a completely different scale. I mean, His kindness towards us is unheard of. The only difference is, we don't know the fullness of His gifts and love towards us yet. Of all the rewards we have and will receive on this earth, it is much more in eternity. The fact is, however kind we think God is now, He is much more than we can even imagine. One day we will look at our lives and see His love all over it. Though many may be offended now and question what has been allowed to happen in their lives, a day is coming when all will realize what the heart of God is truly like. None will be offended in that day because they will understand in clarity God's ways in our lives.

Matthew 7 says “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" Often in my life I expect God to give me a snake or a stone only to find that He is nothing of that kind of giver. The reason I expect that is because I am used to being given the measure of what I deserve. God does not give us what we deserve. He gives us better than what we deserve and we are simply not used to that kind of treatment! I don't know about you, but I don't go around giving people what they don't deserve. If someone makes me angry or if I'm treated wrongly, I unfortunately do just the opposite. That's just human nature. But God is different. Though we deserve nothing, He gives abundantly. When we can, over time, begin to relate to God on these types of terms, He has gained much ground in our hearts. The hardest thing for us to receive is the fact that a God who is so perfect in love and kindness accepts us as we are and is patient with us through our journey of becoming more like Him.

Remembering Where He Brought Me From

Tonight as I enjoy the last fire in my fire place until next Fall/Winter, I ponder about where the Lord has brought me. I’m thinking about how much He has believed in me and how He saw me so differently than I saw myself. I never want to forget the moment when I realized for the first time what His heart was towards me. We have a tendency to forget. Forgetting the past is a good thing, but remembering where the Lord brought us from causes a thankfulness, humility, and gratitude to remain in us. I want to keep it simple. The story of my life is He loved me! And He wrote his name on my heart and called me by a name that was so different than I had given myself! The posture of my heart changed and so did my entire emotional make-up. A freedom to love and be loved broke through all the walls in my heart and I was able to see life with a completely different perspective. Do we know that the Lord has set His affections on us? We are the love of His heart, the apple of His eye, and His favorite! This is what will get us through the ugly parts of life. Although He never promised we would glide through life without problems, what He did say is that His love would remain through all of it. I just always want to remember and be thankful. I never want to take Him for granted. Ok. The End! Time to be happy!

Our Highest Calling

I believe in all of us is a desire to give ourselves so fully to another in complete abandonment. To love another so much that our lives, knowing it is given out of our own free choice, are laid down for the sake of another. There is a beauty in sacrifice. Not for ourselves, but for love. With joy in our hearts we say yes to what seems difficult only to find that it is love that awaits us and love that is calling us. Love is the height of our calling. It is not to become something or to be valuable by the standards we so often live by. It is to love that we are called and love is the only thing that will last beyond what our eyes see today. It is our greatest calling and our greatest reward.

We were meant for so much more than just the boredom of everyday life. Our hearts are made for intimacy. When God made us, He put the ability inside of us for deep friendship and intimacy. Don’t be afraid to be childlike enough with God that you can come to Him without being fearful of what He might say. Many are afraid of what He will say to them. Therefore, they stay arms length away (or farther). You will be wonderfully surprised at what you will hear. It is in His heart and in His words of love about us that we become all that we are meant to be. Yes, you are meant to be a dad, a nurse, a teacher, etc etc. There is a greater calling for you and for I. It is the calling of love. It is when we can come to Him like a child and let Him see every hidden part inside of us without fear. This will completely transform us so we can live life knowing without a doubt that we are someone with a purpose and someone so unique to His heart.

Just like the longing we have to know real love, God desires to shine His face on those that are searching for Him. He will not relent, but will give freely to those who ask Him to show His love to them. Even now He is searching and looking for one whose heart is turned towards Him.

Mother to the Motherless

One thing the Lord told me several years ago was that He was going to teach me to be a mother. Now if you look at my life right now, you would wonder what in the world He meant since I am older with no kids of my own. Yet, His idea of a mother is so much more than what we may consider as being one. Do you know how kind God is? I mean, He is really, really nice. And He is really, really happy. I’ve been on this journey the last 10 or so years of learning about what God is really like. I find that inside of Him is the gentleness and tenderness of a mother. Inside of Him is the safety and love of a father. He has the qualities of a really incredible parent. This is what He wants to teach us. He wants to teach us about who He is and in doing so, we will begin to function with His love and heart on the earth. We will actually begin to be carriers of His love because we have searched and looked for Him. He will give without measure those that look for Him above anything else. I’m not talking about learning the traditions of a church. I’m talking about knowing God. Really, really knowing Him on the heart level. For me, I’ve had to allow Him to chip away the things that I once thought was true about God and let Him rearrange my thinking about how He is towards me. I was an awesome church girl with a lot of messed up ideas about who God was. He is still changing me.

I believe now more than ever the Lord is raising up people who know His heart as Father. In the coming days there will be such a need for those who can bring His heart to broken children. The motherless and fatherless of the earth are increasing beyond what we realize. The nations are filled with kids who are homeless, hungry, and have nothing. I have a feeling as things continue to unfold across the world, that this is only the beginning of a multitude of children who need the Father’s love. If you are one in whom the Lord has put a desire to help children, know that it is not an accident. Be confident in your calling that the Lord Himself has put that in your heart. You are meant for such a time as this.

Many are called to be an umbrella, a shade from the heat, and a place of safety for these little ones. It is so important that we know the heart of God. We must have His heart in the coming days. We must see with His eyes and move with His heart. As we look upon the lowliest most broken people of the earth, we must be able to see the beauty that He sees in them. If there is one thing we should be searching for and longing for, it is the heart of God. Money is not the most important resource (though it is important). We can have all the money in the world to give to people, but we need so much more than that. We must be grounded in love and be able to communicate God’s love to them in a way that is meaningful to them. The problems and hurt they carry are too much for us to fix. We need something more to give than a nice counseling session on how to have a better life. We need the Lord’s power and love to rest on us so much that when we talk and walk among them, we carry His very heart and fragrance. We smell like Him, talk like Him, and love like Him. It’s not the time to think we know how to do it. It’s time to cry out to Him like never before for the realization of His love and anointing for the broken hearted and hurting. We aren’t meant to stay in our little bubble. It’s time to get out and it’s time to carry the heart of God for others. You and I in all of our imperfections are the perfect candidates! It’s time, friends! People need Him!

Well, I’m getting all worked up. I better quit.

Exchanging Religious Duty for Friendship With Jesus

There are many concepts and ideas of who Jesus is and what He is like. Over the years, I have grown to realize the lies in my own heart about God and His nature towards us. For many, Jesus is anything but a fresh of breath air. With so many rules and regulations to follow, they see Christianity as controlling and quite boring. I understand why. I was once one that loved to put all of those rules on others. Without an understanding of what God is truly like, Christianity is just that. One can only try and obey all the rules for so long until either giving up or giving in secretly. The fact is, God wants to walk with us in life as a friend. Spiritual maturity is when you grow to realize that even in your weakness He loves and adores you. No matter how hard we try, we can’t follow all the rules. Those who think they are following the rules, are the maddest and meanest people of all! Thank God He delivered me from this kind of mentality. It’s amazing what a little brokenness can accomplish in our lives! Brokenness is such a gift from God!

When I was younger, I would approach God with a duty mentality. I was coming to Him out of duty because I didn’t want to get in trouble, so to speak. This was my Christian duty, therefore I better stick to it. Unfortunately, this resulted in a very legalistic approach to God that caused me to judge and look down on others who didn’t have the totally awesome prayer life that I had (not so much). I found my journal from back then and realized how much the Lord has changed me from that little religious girl I was back then! I’m still learning a lot about how He is, but I have changed a lot!

I did not realize that as I matured in the Lord (not saying I’m mature, but I have grown in truth) I would find that my time with the Lord would change from duty to pure enjoyment. I found that I actually liked spending time with Him because I began to experience the pleasures of His heart for me. I began to realize how much He really liked me and sometimes He just wanted me to sit with Him so He could whisper again what He felt about me. It was a sweet season of my heart being awakened to what God was like. It was a time of healing and a new understanding of who I was to God began to gain root in my heart. My heart before God was no longer entangled with the bondage of duty and not wanting to disappoint Him. Instead, the Lord Himself was showing me who He truly was and what He thought about me. This was a new concept for me. I simply found that when I was with Him, I felt adored, loved, accepted, and cherished. Not that I wasn’t loved well by others, but I had never felt anything like this before. It was new to me, and if this was who God really was, I wanted more. If He can take the time to change a simple person like myself, I know the invitation stands for anyone. I’m so normal and plain Jane, it’s ridiculous. I still have so much to work on, but if I can say one thing He has changed in me in the last 13 years, I would say it’s the way I view God and how He perceives me. This kind of perception has everything to do with how we live our lives with God. It has everything to do with how we will respond when we sin – whether or not we will run to Him or away. If we know we are loved even in our weakness, we will always run to Him after sinning (not out of rebellion, but sincere people with weak hearts). It won’t happen over night and we can’t do it by ourselves. He will do a work in our hearts – a work of love that will break down all the false ideas we have about Jesus. He is incredible, folks!

Song of Solomon 2:3 “I sat down in His shade with great delight.” There is a shade made available for us. For those who are weary and tired of carrying the load of life, there is a shade we can sit in. It is the shade of the Lord. It’s a place of rest and a place of pure enjoyment. The Lord is refreshing. I have a few people in my life that after I spend time with them, I leave feeling refreshed. Jesus is refreshing. Unlike so many that think He is one who wants to put religious duty on us and weigh us down with rules, He is just the opposite. He wants to take our heavy loads and share His heart with us. This shade is for anyone, not just for a few. It is for people who struggle and people who don’t measure up. It is for the one who has made a lot of mistakes and the one who has been given up on. When we know the pleasures in His heart for us, the areas of insecurity, rejection, paranoia, and self-criticism are shattered. Whenever I get tired of myself (I am my worst enemy), I go and sit in His shade for awhile. I always leave refreshed, strengthened, and ready for what’s next. And I feel much lighter as He always takes the things that I’m worried and fearful about and replaces them with His peace. What a friend we have in Jesus!

A Surprise Visit

There are many things that occur in a heart when it truly encounters the Lord. The one thing that moves me every time about the heart of Jesus is His tenderness. My best days are when I can cry in His presence. Not because of sadness, but because my heart is experiencing His heart. When our hearts touch the heart of Jesus, it is as if the walls and defenses we have built up are torn down and His heart of tender love touches the places that have been deeply hidden inside of us. Its these places which we try to hide with so many different things that He longs for. Oh how I love when I sense the tenderness in His heart. It causes me to love better.

That very thing happened today. While waiting alone in the doctors office, He came. There I was sitting on that very uncomfortable chair looking at the not so great art on the wall and He surprised me with a visit. In that moment, I closed my eyes and sat in silence and completely enjoyed Him as He sat with me. It was like a wave of peace came over me and that all too familiar presence came so near. I wanted to greet Him with "oh its you again! Come and make yourself comfortable by me! Oh wait, you already have. And I'm so glad you did!" Instead, I did not say a word. Really good friends don't have to talk. They can sit together in the comfort of knowing they are in safe company. This is His desire for us! It is in moments like this that I'm reminded I have a friend so dear and so close. This friend, Jesus, has unending tenderness and mercy towards us. The sweetness in His heart no one can fathom! And even though I often write about Him publicly, I really like the fact that He is personal with us. I like it that He wants to spend time with us alone...just you and Him! He knows the ends and outs of our lives and we don't have to put up any fronts with Him. More surprise visits, please!

Dealing with Changes and Transitions

As people, we normally don’t like change. Actually, it’s more that we don’t like the time of transition that accompanies the change. There is nothing harder than to be in the middle of what used to be and what is about to be. There are many transitions that occur over our lifetime. We will all agree that change is both necessary and good, but walking it out can sometimes be difficult.

There are chunks of seasons in all of our lives that produce different purposes in us. Each one is very different, but very necessary. We need to become analyzers of our lives. Sounds fun, right?! For example, think about the chunks, or seasons, in your life up to this point. Depending on how old you are will determine how many there have been.

Let’s talk about our pasts. People say to forget the past, but I find it is incredibly important to diagnose, analyze, and remember it. Even in the most difficult times of our pasts, it is helpful to ask God for His understanding as to why those things happened. Many times we can’t grasp the big picture of what God is doing in the present. It may not be until years later that we have the right perspective and understanding of what God was doing in us back then. This isn’t always the case, but sometimes it is. We should be excited to get old and look back on our lives and see the definite hand of God in it. I know it is with us right now, but we will have much more understanding of it the older we get. The longer you live, the more you tend to see the bigger picture. You will find that even among the mistakes nothing was wasted. Looking back on our lives up to this point can produce an even more “I love you God” in our hearts if we have the ability to see God’s hand in it. There’s a bit of romance in it.

Nothing can help get us through present situations than to look back at our past and see the times God has taken care of us. He wants us to remember how He has gotten us through before so we can believe the same for today. Sometimes this is all we have – a memory of God’s faithfulness. Like I said earlier, the hardest place to live is the in-between place of what used to be and what is ahead. It could be that you believe God for something in prayer and it hasn’t happened yet. You feel as though you are standing in the middle of an impossible situation waiting for God to answer. Or, it could be a time of transition in the natural. Maybe life is looking different than it used to and you haven’t quite gotten used to the flow of how it is going. Remember, change is necessary and important. When things change, you have to trust that God’s purpose in the season that has just ended has been accomplished. This is hard because we get used to how life looks. We get used to relationships and knowing what to expect in our day to day lives. When a new season begins, we can feel vulnerable and confused as to where life is headed. We aren’t in as much control, so we tend to worry and have anxiety or fear.

Think about the season of life you are in. Are you in the middle of a season that you have been in for awhile? Life is comfortable, you know what to expect, and nothing is really changed in awhile? Know that probably at some point you will encounter a new beginning of some sort. Or maybe you are in a time of transition and everything has recently changed. Wherever you are, I hope you are encouraged that in your life there will be many changes that take place. Over and over, your life will look different and your role will change. This is all a part of God’s plan. Trusting Him is the difficult part!

God's Soccer Team - He Chooses the Worst First?

All of us have memories of what our favorite recess activity was. At Fairbanks Elementary School in Morenci, AZ, we had lots of options. I remember the group of girls who would carry around their stereo playing Garth Brooks and George Strait with their awesome slap bracelets. I also remember future cheerleaders trying out their stunts with their extra high bangs and pony tails swaying as they practiced their awesome stunts. Then there were traditional playing like swinging, sliding, and the tire swing. If you went to school with me, I know you have a big smile on your face right now! There were other activities like basketball courts, a huge soccer field, and a large grassy area for football, etc. This is where you would often see kids picking teams for competition. As they stood waiting to be chosen by the two kids picking soccer teams, everyone standing knew who would get chosen first, second, third, and on and on. They knew who can kick the ball and who can’t. They knew who would be the last standing with a bit of embarrassment as he/she knew they were the last one to be chosen. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone the order in which these kiddos would be picked by the team leader. I wonder what would happen if one day the team leader would’ve chosen that person first. He/She would have gotten lots of confusing looks, including from the person chosen, as to why that choice was made.

There are a lot of people in life that feel just the same as that kid did. With their head hanging low and their confidence barely hanging on by a thread, they wait their entire life for someone to notice them. They are used to being last, unnoticed, and without favor. They aren’t good at many things and nothing about them would cause someone to look their way. They seem to be in the “forgotten” category and have lived with this kind of label placed on them by others.

The heart of God not only wants to surprise us with His positive affirmation concerning our lives, but He especially has a place in His heart for the one who feels forgotten and unwanted. He longs to tear the labels off of our lives that have been placed on us by other’s opinions and words concerning who we are. Everyone carries false labels put on them by others and the Lord wants to break them off so we can live life from our true identity, which is one who is the Lord’s love and delight! He wants us to be confident and aware that we are the apple of His eye.

1 Corinthians 1:26 says “Remember that few of you were wise in the world’s eyes or powerful or wealthy when God called you. 27 Instead, God chose things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise. And he chose things that are powerless to shame those who are powerful. 28 God chose things despised by the world, things counted as nothing at all, and used them to bring to nothing what the world considers important.”

To know that God actually chooses the despised, things counted as nothing, and things considered foolish just doesn’t make sense to us. He is so different than us and sees beyond physical looks, wealth, and other things many use as a standard to judge. His so called soccer team is made up of people who can barely kick a ball, run kinda funny, and wear cheap off brand athletic shoes! That’s really good news for people like me who make all kinds of silly mistakes and is often the source of many peoples’ laughter and rolled-eyes! I don’t love Him because I’m strong enough to. I love Him because inside of His big heart is a place for someone like me!

This is why it’s an incredible thing for someone to carry God’s heart for another because it is a love that is greater than what we experience on the earth. God isn’t tainted by our culture and the way we make decisions about others. He is both pure and perfect LOVE and no one can change His mind about you! He will make you feel like an only child, that you have His full glance, and that you are His favorite!

God's Fingerprints on Our Lives and Relationships

Every relationship in our lives has numerous purposes and potential for teaching us about ourselves and about life in general. Do we live with the understanding and feeling of awe that every friendship that is formed during this time on the earth is intimately woven together by the very hand of God? When we do, we are more able to recognize God’s divine hand in our lives and can know that nothing happens by chance. By doing so, we can grow more in the potential that God has for every single one of us because we know our life is important. When we know our importance, it protects us from living in hopelessness and despair and reminds us that even in the boredom of some days, God is taking notice. It’s so important we live with this kind of perspective. Life is so much more fun with a sense of destiny in the “normal” things, like friendships. I love thinking about my friends and family and how, among all the billions of people on the earth, I am meant to share life with them. God wants us to be wowed by the normal every day parts of life! Our lives have destiny written all over it, and our relationships are among the most important and enjoyable things He has given us. God wants us to see His fingerprints on our every day normal lives.

The problem with you and I is that we sometimes stink at relationships. What we need to realize is that even if we have made mistakes or have regrets in relationships, nothing is a waste when it comes to living life better. It’s hard for us to see that even in our mistakes God can work something beautiful on the inside of us. That’s what God does best. He is really, really good at this! He can take any situation or relationship, even though it may never be the way it was at one time, and teach us about how to live life better. Then, there are times that He can heal the brokenness in the relationship to where it is better than what it was. Bitterness, on the other hand, tells us to give up and live in our anger and unforgiveness, when God wants to use every situation for us to become who we are supposed to become. Take advantage of what God wants to do even in life’s mistakes.

Take a minute and think about the people in your life. Begin to live every day knowing that it is no coincidence they have been brought into your life. It may just be for a season, or it may be for a lifetime. Take advantage of the gift of friendship that has been given to you, and in return, be the gift that you are meant to be to someone else. Keep the right perspective when dealing with broken relationships or mistakes and be open to the change that God wants to bring in your life so you can live life to your fullest potential. Most of all, don’t forget how important you are!! Oh, and laugh a lot.

God's Time Line - Days of Mercy

It’s so important to understand the days we are living in. It’s kind of incredible to think that the beginning of life on the earth was just one part of God’s history. The fact that He always was is enough to overwhelm our little brains. It is simply hard to comprehend the fact that God had no beginning. Yet, in that time before the earth was created, He thought up everything that we see and know. Imagine God’s never ending time line and the beginning of humanity being somewhere on that. We are going towards something. There are other events on His time line and we don’t have to be in the dark about them. As a matter of fact, He willingly and very much desires that we share in what He is doing and WILL do in future events. He wants us to know so we are both ready and not surprised when those coming events take place.

I don’t want to write so much about future events, although I greatly encourage you to take the time to know what those events are. I want us to ponder about the time we are living in right now on the earth. When I say “right now,” I actually mean from the beginning of time, when people were first created and put on the earth. I’m talking about the chunk on God’s time line from the first human being put on the earth until now. From that time on we have lived in a time of mercy. Yes, we are indeed living in a time of mercy. Because of Jesus’ sacrifice in making a way for us to know God, every human being has been given the chance to know Him. God has given us this span of 70 or 80 years with the opportunity of actually getting to choose whether we want to spend the next years in eternity with Him.

Do we realize how incredibly short this time on the earth is? Picture God’s time line again. It has no starting place, but always was. In the middle somewhere is the day you were born. A short distance longer, the day you will die. Then, it is a NEVER ENDING time line from there on. God has many plans for every single one of us even into eternity. He has given us these short few years, a span of mercy, to be able to say yes to Him. It may be short, but our days on the earth are so precious to God. Every choice we make for Him He is writing down and taking notice. Every decision counts and matters to Him. He doesn’t forget any of them. They may not weigh much now, and people may not honor or praise you for making such choices, but in eternity the weight and value of those choices will be seen as they really are.

Many are fearful about what lies after death. You don’t have to be! Take advantage of your life on the earth, because it does matter what we do. Our lives really are being recorded! It’s so exciting to know every choice counts! And also, because of Jesus, our sin is the only thing that is not recorded or evaluated. His love covers our multitude of sins so we are able to stand in relationship with Him without shame. When we stand before God on that day, He will mention a lot of things about our lives. He will recall small things that we have forgotten, but He remembers. He will talk about the times we honored Him by helping and loving others. There is one thing He won’t mention, and that is our sin.

Isaiah 55:6 “Seek the Lord while He may be found, call on Him while He is near.” It’s astounding to know that in your life and in mine, God can be found. All we have to do is make room for Him. Take advantage of these years of mercy, for the best is yet to come!

Spirit of Adoption - Knowing the Father's Heart in Days to Come

There are so many different parts of God’s personality that gives us different pictures of how He loves us. I want to mention one that happens to be one of my most favorite parts of God. In all of history, there has never been the amount of parentless children than there are now on the earth. Because of increasing violence, wars, and the spread of AIDS, the number of orphans in the world is increasing at a frightening rate. I believe that in the days to come, God will raise up many who know Him as Father. Yes, it will be because of the many who have lost their parents, but it will also be for the ones who have parents, but have lived in abuse and neglect. The brokenness among children will so increase over time that we have to be prepared by knowing the heart of our Father for them. There will be those who are called to bring His heart to children in the most devastating situations. They will have an understanding of the Father’s heart and will not only communicate it to them, but will carry the “spirit of adoption” that is talked about in Romans 8:15. Orphanages will be started, individual adoptions will take place more than ever before, and people will hear the call to go and rescue them in the darkest of areas on the earth. They will tell them of their value, that they are wanted, and that they have a family. It will beautiful, a reflection of what God loves doing.

Even now He is looking for those who will say yes to become a spiritual mother or father. You may not ever adopt or live at an orphanage in a third world country. But you can find a kid that needs your hugs, love, and attention. They are everywhere. We don’t realize the impact we can have on a little one’s life. Then again, you might be someone that will be so privileged to go to the poorest of places in the world to live among them, feed them, clothe them, and hold them.


James 1:27 “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress…”

Isaiah 40:11 “…He gathers them in His arms and holds them close to His heart…”

Isaiah 49:15 “They said, ‘The Lord has forsaken me the, the Lord has forgotten me.’ Can a mother forget the baby at her side and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you.”

The Narrow Way

It is true God calls us to live on a narrow path. Sometimes that path is very different than what we might imagine. It is often uncomfortable and even called unnecessary to the one who would see it as so. It’s a path of many sacrifices. It’s giving our lives up to find Him. God is not balanced when it comes to loving us. He gave us His entire self. His jealousy over our lives is a reflection of anything but half-hearted devotion. For there is nothing half hearted about Him. There is nothing balanced about Him. He went all the way. He loved us to the point of literally giving up His life! In the same way, we are not called to give Him only a part of our hearts, but everything. The cry in our hearts should be, “I will go where you want me to go and I will do what you want me to do no matter what that looks like. And I do it out of love, not because I have to.” That looks different for every person. For one it may be saying yes to raising children and being a full time mom or dad. For someone else it may be teaching (wink, wink). For someone else it may be literally giving their life as a martyr. Not everyone will be martyrs, but we can all be living martyrs – those that live so in love with the Lord that we would do anything for Him, even if it means giving up things that are seen as necessary and valuable. That is the narrow way. It’s not the easiest way, but it’s the only way to truly find Him. Whatever it looks like in your life, it’s an honor to give Him our very best.

To say we are called to love Him is something that easily rolls off of our tongues. But what does the path of love look like? Do you know how difficult it is to live a life where He is our only audience? Of course you do. If you don’t, I will tell you. It’s difficult! It’s hard living our life with our identity being in God alone. That means, it doesn’t matter so much what people’s opinions are of us, good or bad. Instead, it’s about what we do when no one is looking and learning to live under His values, which are quite different than what we are used to. It’s not about promoting ourselves to become the next best thing. It’s about being the lowest and most humble servant we can be and promoting others ahead of us. It’s about loving unconditionally and taking the last seat so to speak. It’s about loving our enemies and blessing those that curse us. It’s about our inward life and thoughts, not so much our outward appearance. It’s about blessing others in secret and never telling anyone. It’s realizing that God is the only one that sees every part of you, and His opinion is the only one that counts. If we can live out of that reality – that His opinion of us really is the only one that counts, do you know what kinds of things we could accomplish on the earth for His Kingdom?

That’s what He is calling us to – to have our identity so wrapped up in Him, that we aren’t afraid, we aren’t insecure, and we aren’t aware of what other people think. And, of course, we love everyone who talks about us, insults us, and does any wrong against us. Yikes! That’s a tough one! He is calling us to confidence in Him and in His heart and opinion about us. We must be growing in intimacy with Him. It is this kind of love relationship with the Lord that will guard our hearts against being offended at what does or does not happen in our lives. Staying close to the Lord in prayer will protect us from the many disappointments that will happen over our lifetime. The person who is confident in love will love well, especially the ones who treat him/her wrong. You can love your enemy when you know the One that really matters most is undeniably for you and not against you. Our identity must be rooted in Him, or we will get swayed with the opinions of others and end up wasting our lives just because we cared what someone else thought. Think about it! What a waste to let someone else have that kind of control over us! He is calling us back to the first commandment – loving Him with all of our hearts, soul, mind, and strength. It’s only when we have this as first place in our hearts that we can learn to love others well. It doesn’t work the other way around.

Living the narrow way is saying yes to having Him change us. It’s making a real choice to live by His values and not what’s popular in our culture. It is the way of love, serving others, and humility. It’s being ok with living in the background and not being the next best thing. It’s giving your life for someone else to be successful. Will it be easy? Absolutely not. Will it be worth it? I think so.

Experiencing a Bit of Heaven on Earth - Jesus' Heart for Us

In every heart lies a great desire to love another to the point of moving their heart. When our hearts are touched by another, our emotions are stirred and we call it being “moved.” It is intimacy we long for. It is intimacy we are made for. No one should be sorry for longing for this, for our hearts are made to have such sweet moments both with God and others. We are meant to both receive and give this kind of love. Whether it is a friend, a spouse, or a family member, our hearts are made for such kind of relationships. It is inside of every single person and we can’t deny the fact that we love being loved and love giving love. We were made for this.

In the heart of God, it is the same longing that is found. Deep within His heart lies such desire for friendship and intimacy with us. It is not the angels that His heart desires, though they must be glorious. It is humans like you and I that catch His glance. Though He is high and lofty sitting on a throne, He stoops so low as to look at us, calling us by name and longing simply that we would open our hearts to Him. He wants to serve us, help us, come along side us, and love us. What kind of God is this that truly wants to be involved in our lives? He wants to hear our voice, but not out of duty. He loves when we are sincere...when we actually think about what we are telling Him, and not say a quick prayer for the sake of checking it off. For who wants to be talked to simply out of duty? He longs for sincere words from us. Just like us, He loves to be moved and He loves to be loved. And just like us, He wants someone to share His thoughts with. And just like us, He wants to be listened to and enjoyed.

Next time you talk to Him, think about what you are saying. Don’t be so quick to say the list of needs you have before hitting the sack. Yes, He wants you to ask for things. He absolutely does! But make it a goal to stop for a moment, quiet your heart, and tell Him how you feel about Him. In doing so, be ready to listen to Him as He begins to unfold His heart towards you. You will begin to experience the tenderness and compassion that He has for you. Stick with it and you will find that your heart will become more and more aware of His presence until you too are moved by His thoughts and affection towards you. It is an invitation for all of us – young, old, poor, single, married, etc. It’s an invitation to experience a bit of heaven on earth – the heart of Jesus for us.

God's Parenting Skills - How He Deals With Us

I was three years old as I stood in front of my house in the tiny town of Campo, Colorodo. Wide-eyed and ready to make a run for it, I had set my mind on one thing. My grandma’s house. She lived across the street and was ready and willing at any time for me to eat her candy. My little three year old mind knew this and was ready to take action for that to occur. Before the coming of this day, I would stand in front of my window and gaze across the street dreaming of being at my grandma’s house, a place where candy had no boundaries! This particular day I was ready to go beyond the gazing and make a run for it! Who knows if I had shoes or decent clothes on. I’m sure I didn’t and I didn’t care. I crossed the street and ran into my grandma’s house who was oh so happy to see I had come. A sweet hug and smile were exchanged, and then the candy came out. I was soon a very happy little girl! Not long after, I heard a voice yelling, “Marci, Marci!” It was a voice I knew oh so well. My daddy. He was coming to get me and take me home. I’m sure he explained to me the dangers of crossing the street and not having an adult. I just wanted some candy. I went back home with my daddy and listened to what he had to say. Then, without hesitation, when his back was turned, I made my way across the street again to be with my grandma and eat her candy! As you can see, this situation became a training opportunity for my parents. From what they tell me, it took awhile for the lesson to sink in to my little mind! The above story occurred over and over again, day after day! My parents should have just given me candy and it would have solved the problem! J Ha!

I just want to write a few thoughts on what our Father is like. How does He handle all of us? What does He do when He has a “kid” like me, who is so stubborn? What are His ways in changing and disciplining us? Oh how I love the way He deals with us! I love the heart of our Father for weak and broken human beings!! There is no doubt that He is intimately involved and committed in training us to become who we are meant to be. Life is full of lessons to be learned, and often it takes several situations for us to mature to the point of having the wisdom He wants us to have. Mistakes are both necessary and beneficial if we let them be.

There are so many different theories on parenting. Some parents believe in spanking, others believe effective communication will do the trick. There are so many different strategies out there. Our Father has His own way of changing, training, and “parenting” us. And it is perfect. He is the perfect parent! I can’t go on without including one of my favorite verses, “…He doesn’t treat us as our sins deserve, or repay us according to our sin.” (Psalms 103) It’s scary to think what we really deserve. Yet, God doesn’t give us what we deserve. He treats us much better than we deserve. There are so many things He overlooks and forgets concerning our lives. Because of Jesus, we can actually have peace with God (Romans 5:1). That means we can be friends with Him and our sin no longer stands in the way. He has made a way for weak and broken human beings to actually come close to God. This is incredible! I mean, this is INCREDIBLE! So, what I am saying is…God is just really super nice to us. Beyond what we even realize. He is WAY nice. I love that He is this way!

So, if He doesn’t treat us as we deserve, how does He change us? Do you know He has a goal for you in mind? Do you know He is so excited about who you will become? And do you know that what you will become is how He sees you TODAY? When my stubbornness stopped me from obeying my daddy, He knew that I wouldn’t always have that problem of crossing the street without being cautious! He knew I would grow up one day and be able to process in my mind that a car could be coming and I might want to look both ways before crossing. My dad knew I wouldn’t always have that problem of not obeying Him in that situation. God knows the struggles and weaknesses we have now won’t always have a hold of us. He probably says things like, “Yes, (your name) is not so good at that, but you just wait…wait until you see what she/he becomes. It will blow your mind!!” That’s why it’s so important we have hearts that are set on eternity. This world is so temporary. Everything about it will fade away in time. I can’t wait for what’s next, and God can’t either! He is so excited about YOU! His heart swells with pride when He thinks about you. Yes, life on this earth is cruddy at times, especially when we realize our worst enemy is often ourselves. We don’t have the power to change us. We simply can’t be good on our own. But, this life is an itty bitty tiny part of the big picture. What lies after this 70 or 80 years on the earth will be glorious beyond what we can even think or imagine. God dreams of that day too – because you will be all that you are meant to be. He sees you today, not as a messed up individual (though you may be), but as someone who will be very useful to Him in the age to come. He has plans for all of us, more than we can think or imagine! And you will love Him with all of your heart. The things that you struggle with now will be gone in just a little while longer. We won’t just be floating on clouds and singing lullabies. So, one way God changes us is through communicating truth to our hearts of who we are through His eyes. When we know His heart towards us, we are more likely to turn to Him in dark times. If we believe the lies about God, that He is distant, mad, and disappointed, we tend to not turn to Him and stay in our shame and despair. The fear of what He thinks or feels about us is enough for us to stay away. Oh Lord, break the lies in our hearts that we might know the incredible truth you have to say about us! He really, really likes us!

Finally, I want to mention Psalms 103:13-17.

“As a Father has compassion on His children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust. As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more. But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord’s love is with those who fear him…”

Ok, everyone smile really big now! Time to be happy and have hope!

A New Perspective on Life: Knowing Our Importance and Trusting God's Timing

I had a dream last night that made a big impact on me. I’ve been thinking about it all day. I saw my life. Not as it is, but instead as a round checker piece being played on a checker board. I wasn’t the only piece on the board, but there were several others. Actually, I was surrounded by checker pieces. I was one of many. I saw the actual hand of God reach down and begin to move and shuffle certain pieces around me. I knew the one red checker piece I was looking at symbolized my life and the others around me were relationships I have in my life now. I couldn’t tell you who they were right off hand, I just knew that what I was looking at was a picture of how God had moved people into my life. It was the people in and around my life. There was divine purpose involved in every move of His hand. The sense I had was that each piece was in the exact and perfect place for God’s purpose to unfold. In that moment as I looked at my life being displayed on this checker board, God began to show me several different things.

First of all, I realized that this thing I call “my life” is a very small part of a huge plan. It wasn’t that my life was any less important, I just saw it from a different perspective. It was as if I thought I was the only checker piece on the board and I was shocked to see that there were others, lots of others involved. It is good for us to realize that our lives aren’t only about ourselves. This keeps us from living in self-pity and helps us to have the perspective that life is about others, not just our personal wants and needs. What we tend to forget is how important our life really is to others. We get caught up in the things we need and want, or wish we had, when God has placed us right in the middle of His perfect plan. That plan is not about us getting everything we think we need. A large part of it is how our life fits into others around us. The role we play in other’s lives is huge. We tend to forget this. Selfishness often sneaks into my own heart and stops me from being everything God desires me to be in the lives of those around me. Just like you, I play lots of roles in my life. A daughter, sister, friend, coworker, teacher, and aunt are a few of them. Each role is different than the other and we help fulfill someone else’s life in each one. If we choose the way of self-pity, we tend to isolate ourselves and the relationships we are meant to fulfill are left on the back burner. We so easily get consumed in our own lives that we forget we are made for community. We aren’t made to live life alone, but walking with the other relationships that God has divinely put in our lives. When things aren’t going our way, sometimes God’s answer is not to pick up our checker piece and move it. Sometimes we need to stay right where we are at. It’s not about what we need, but we have to realize where God has placed us has a much bigger purpose than ourselves. If we can get our eyes off of ourselves and begin to see the need in others around us, to be a blessing to them and stop living in self-pity, we will indeed begin to see our lives as God wants us to

Ok, this next one really gets the best of me. It is God’s timing verses our timing. Sometimes my impatience gets the best of me. There are things in all of our hearts we want to happen. We all have dreams we want to take place in our lives. Waiting for those things to happen probably produces more character in us than if they were to happen in our timing. Waiting does incredible things on the inside of us!! It is NOT fun! Sometimes we wonder why God hasn’t moved us on to the next stage of our lives when there is a purpose in the waiting. It’s especially hard when He has put things inside of us that are from Him that we want to do in our lifetime. We often want to rush it. What a reminder to trust His leadership and timing in our lives. To know that His hand is the One that is making the moves can bring such a peace inside of us. We can trust Him….we can trust Him with our entire lives! When His response is simply to wait, or if He says “not yet,” we know it is for our benefit. Even in the waiting, we are being formed and prepared for what God wants to do next in our life. He is always doing something in us! Knowing He is good is enough for us to trust His decisions in our lives. May we not get offended at what we do or don’t have in our lives. He is good and knows what is best! Sometimes this is all we have to cling to when we don’t understand the situations that are taking place in our lives. And really, that’s all we need to know. His love for us is enough.

Lastly, I hope you know how incredibly important your life is. Some may feel alone, others surrounded by others, yet with a sense of emptiness. God wants to remind us of His purpose for us, that we aren’t meant to live life feeling like we are a gerbil on a wheel. Before time began, so much thought was put into your life. And you are one of those checker pieces that God has strategically placed in the position you are in. It’s not easy sometimes, but trust that your life is bigger than the things you see. You are not only needed, but so important and valuable to this journey we call life.

He Knew What He Was Getting Into When He Saw Me

God is not shocked by our disfunction, inability to perform perfection, and lack of wisdom in situations. We often forget that we are children, grown-ups who have a long ways to go and who won't ever reach our full potential on this side of time. If you are a little (or a lot) competitive in nature like me, it becomes very difficult to live out of a place of child-likeness. In thinking that I am strong enough to make things happen in and among myself causes a lot of extra problems in my life that could be avoided if I would learn the lesson of leaning and depending in God. God has a way of setting up perfect situations for us to learn. He is dedicated to us becoming who we are meant to become, even if it means bringing brokeness by His kindness in allowing things to happen that will change us.

Just this morning I found myself again face to face with how weak I really am. The Lord is so gracious to shine his light on our hearts, especially when we feel we are making more progress than we really are. The fact that we are keeping tabs in progress is what the lord wants to change in us, or me anyways. If my heart could just learn to rest and quit analyzing my own condition, whether good or bad! There is a beautiful place in God of knowing who you are, yet saying yes to Him without shame. It is about taking a posture of humility and servanthood.

So this morning as I bawled and complained before God at the many ways He needs to change my heart and how He can't use me until I'm "better," He made me bawl even more at His response. I felt Him smile over me and reassure me that He is in this thing with me for the long haul. He is WILLING to help me. He says yes to the process in my life and is patient with me. As Misty Edwards sings about Him, "he knew what he was getting into when he saw me." He isn't shocked by our immaturity. He doesn't forget we are children, learning along the way! So I am ok....even though I do have a long ways to go. Im ok! The desire to please Him weighs a lot more than the mistakes we make along the way.

Friendship...Learning to Carry His Heart for Others

As I get older, I love friendship more and more. I think it’s probably because I realize the value of it. I know that if a person has a few people they can truly call their friends in a lifetime, they are blessed. I’ve been on a journey of learning about what it means to be a friend. There have been a few key people in my life that have taught me how to be a friend. I have learned to open my heart in honesty and sincerity, to be one that communicates, and one that listens. I wasn’t good at any of that. I still struggle with it now, but have come a really long ways! I’m still learning and am blessed to have true friends that I can learn from.

I believe a true friend is not just someone that you can have a good time with, although this is certainly true. I think we limit it to this definition when there is so much more that our hearts were made for in the subject of friendship. I believe true friends have the privilege of going on a lifetime journey of getting to know the other person, seeing how the Lord sees them, and helping them to become that person. The Lord wants to speak to us about our friends. He wants to partner with us so we know His heart for each other. I am a better friend when I carry His heart. It is when we share the actual emotions of His heart for someone else that we can know the intimacy of friendship. Do we know how powerful it is to actually know what God thinks of another? To not only know His thoughts, but communicate them to someone? This is available to us – He is ready and willing to speak to us about other people in our lives. May we begin to ask Him what His thoughts are concerning others.

Oh how the Lord must love friendship. Hidden in the chambers of His heart is a love and longing for friendship. God is so affectionate. His emotions are so pure and undefiled that nothing earthly can compare to the endless flow of love and affection that flows from His heart. He is calling us to take hold of this part of His nature and He is most willing to teach us. He wants us to experience the full measure of friendship on the earth. It is a part of Him – and we are meant to walk in it because we were made in His image.

All of the baggage that comes from the past is not enough for God to be unwilling to teach us how to be vulnerable to each other. He will teach us to open our hearts when all we’ve had is others crush us in the past. Although we won’t be perfect at it, He will give us grace to walk this gift out called friendship. May we experience ALL that we are meant to…and friendship being one of the many experiences God wants to give us!